Friday's Emails (continued)

Me: um, Halloween is coming early this year?

Bonnie: “I think they aren't really happening that early. I'm just having anxiety over not really having Halloween plans, so I keep imagining people are doing halloween stuff when really they aren't. I live in fear that I'll see a terrible picture of someone and make a comment that's like "Weird halloween costume. What is that? A Mummy?" and they'll be like "um, no, I was actually in a car accident and this is just medical bandage." Kind of like that whole "never ask a fat lady when the baby is due" type of deal, but I just can't control myself.

Last night when I was going to bed (stoned, yes), I really kind of started freaking out about my trip to New York and how, most likely, I will literally get actually depressed and cry when I have to leave. Life is hard. Also, I am effing sick of being single (!), and the (wedding + Dani and Jason being all engaged + Canto and Lin being in love) combo might push me right over the edge. We have to figure out why men have no interested in being with me for more than the length of a blow job and an awkward cuddle. Multiple glasses of champagne will probably really aid this process. “

Me. Can I put that entire email up on the new blog?

Bonnie: “hahaha. You can put the first part up, about the halloween costumes. The blow jobs? Maybe not so much. Eh, I actually really don't care. It's not a secret. Plus, I'm just so hungry for internet fame.”